THE SULCI Vs THE GYRI

Ive been alive for 22 years..... being raised up in a country where theres second largest population while around 16% of land area in the world means, we have been through a hell lot of competition.....

in our country there is competition for toddlers as to which playschool they get themselves in....we dnt let our children play , we prepare them for war even before they are born... We dont remember ourselves that small but what about now?

Well i am a student and i like it so much that i intend to be one for atleast half a decade more, whatever; an average student like me in whichever state of India, have one thing in common ; EXAMS.

So here we go, millions of brains, thousands of books, hundreds of days but wait, whats this, are u kidding me the exam is tomorrow ?

so here flows a xyz watt electric current through the brains of millions of students...

.

10 hours before exam : 25 chapters, target :3 chapters per hour

9 hours before exams: target 4 chapters per hour

8 hours for exam to start: i am hungry, make maggi, call friends, disturb foes

7 hours: target 4 chapters evry 45 mins

6 hours to go : i am sleepyyy zzzzzzz, ask 3 people in different parts of nation to call me up aftr an hour , also inform the hostel about it

5 hours left and i am snoooozing

ohhh shit!!!

wtf

helllo mumma, yess yesss i m awake now lemme finish this up

oh jesus save me

3 hours to go and i go through 6 chapters, i stop smiling but start vibrating and singing loudly as ive put on rock music to help myself against distraction, distractin, you read it correct!!

2 hours i take bath and drink coffee and complete other 4 chapters; hell where did this new text come in the book , i swear it wasnt there before!!

1 hour, have bfast, bath, pray, get some extra oxygen and 15 chapters to go

30 mins and 10 more chapters covered

reached examination hall : completed the rest 5 chapters, revised the " main" topics and pray to god again then helped others with verbal revision and now i m ready for any test in the world.

Now this makes me proudly believe that our country has sharpest and well developed brains in the whole world and that we are fighters, not survivors... be proud of our country and take care of it... put your brains in right direction and help as much as you can, work for our nation....:)

the forbidden planet flashback

Aliens exist but are yet to visit earth

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Tue, Aug 31 03:06 PM

Beijing, Aug 31 (IANS) Extra-terrestrial beings do exist but they have not yet come to visit our planet, and the best way to communicate with aliens is to send radio signals, a top Chinese official said Tuesday.

Zhu Jin, curator of the Beijing Planetarium, said aliens are likely to be present on some planets. Since there are about one trillion planets going around fixed stars, the possibility of the earth being the only planet with living creatures was 'too slim to be true', China Daily reported.

But as to reports of sighting of unidentified flying objects (UFOs), Zhu said they cannot be true.

Some UFOs were proved to be planes, kites or other normal objects, and many weird situations can be re-demonstrated and re-created, he said.

Zhu said the distance the Voyager 1 spacecraft has travelled in the past 33 years only accounts for one-thousandth of the solar system's reach. It will take 10,000 years for human beings to visit planets outside the solar system.

So, if aliens living in a faraway planet have a similar level of intelligence as human beings, it was impossible for them to travel to earth, he said.

unless dear diary they are us......We are here and we are invisible to them....they cant see us but we can... their language is simple.... but we are here for a purpose, a purpose beyond their imagination....

THE FORBIDDEN PLANET IV

I AM GOING TO THE FORBIDDEN PLANET

TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!

FOR TWO EARTH YEARS

PART OF TRUTHISFIRE COMMITTEE

MUM IS SCARED OUT OF HER WITS

M TOO EXCITED TO FORM SENTENCES

ILL TAKE U ALONG DEAR DIARY

The forbidden planet III

Prothornicurous
*&^$
Dear diary,
Had a wonderful day tonight!!! I am having my own flying license now:) thank god little charliezi gave me my new reebok wings
time to party...yahooooo
party reminds me , i saw a diary of an old woman of the forbidden planet in the grangier library party meet
today... grangier library gives directions to those whom she feels must read..the mind map was very exhaustive m awed to be in it today.... (P.S. i flew on my way there too :D).
so now our earthen alien friend was 9 years old ;more old than our great grandpa...her name was Ursula.... she belonged to united states of America, which was one of the land masses on earth.... there was a story of a plane crash in some towers ... Humans could die sudden death unlike ours and i dont know why she was sad about it... maybe she wasnt taught how to suppress self pitying hormones in preschool...
you know these hormones produced so many emotions in ursula that she cried.... her fellows couldnt survive because they dint had ninja titanium turtle shells.... if i find Ursula , ill generate one for her!
one line from her diary " i am shocked at how people conspire to kill some others of whom they dont even know about, my uncle had a month old child i wish he wouldnt have gone to wtc that day.. may his soul rest in peace and so be the others "
now I wish to see earth one day...what has remained of it, what it originally was like, what is a tower, how could so many people fly together, i mean dint their wings tangle?, what was oxygen like? why couldnt humans read other's mind? even an infant knowshow to do that here... God!! m tired and exhausted.
Mummy is surprised to see me sober for so long so is pluto.....Ill get back to research after jogging four rounds of equator.....that would be enough of the rest i require to regain energy..anyhow
good night,
Gabraile

The forbidden planet II

prothornicurous
!@#$%
dear diary,
miss daffodilarity said if my project the forbidden planet is considered exhaustive enough, i will be allowed to travel 150 light years and actually try and find the aliens of planet earth!!!!
i am excited a lot :)
The forbidden planet was formed billions of years ago in a galaxy called milky way.... This planet was blue instead of our red planet.... it had very queer things in it....like water which is something which is made up in our body on its own....There were wide variety of animals there who were interdependent on one another.... the planet was self sustaining until a new breed of organisms evolved from it..... These animals are our predecessors, infact miss suzie said another day that the cause of their extinction was their overdeveloped brain which was unable to concentrate on the relevant matters but were keen on self sustainance only...... Their iq was more than ours but that proved detrimental to them... the language we speak , the technology we use actually was discovered by them.... our species was made up of a synthetic bacteria made by humans who incorporated the features of their favourite organisms in us over time.
These features were called genes...so we are made up of half of a mans brain, strong like indian tiger, fast like cheetah, friendly like dog, hard working like horse, happy like dolphin, frugitarious like elephants , self sustaining like plants and some more....we were an experimment wherein humans converted us into a biodiversified organism who just need gravity to live.......
thanku humans ...ill try finding out more about you tommorow.......time to rotate the planet and look for dad in the sky...
gnyt
Garbraile

THE FORBIDDEN PLANET I

Prothornicurous; #$^&
Dear diary,
i went to tenth standard today....my second birthday is after four months.... m so excited about it... Today when i went to library i saw a picture of a planet called earth... after that i prompt the librarian to give me more information. It promised me that it would ... i think i would love to study more about the planet as my curiosity project... oops mumma calling i have to change my intestines and pancreas today .... will tell u the details tomorrow!! please do not tell all this to her she hates discussing about the forbidden planet and its history , she tells me papa will sharpen my tail and i wont be able to sit for a month then.... i have a feeling somebody is reading you, i want to say that i dont want to hurt anyone ... if still you want to now more about the earth and how it got extinct, read on!!!
love,
Garbriale

THE SLANG GENERATION :p

Theres no doubt in the fact that language is a highly specialized skill of humans ... in a way its a complicated form of signals other animals use..... wateva, due to the formation of global village all the different kinda lingos which once developed in geographically different regions, is being converted into a cool universal one...........
but the origin and propagation of these have lead to widespread bewilderness amongst the poor unsocial people tch tch...............
When i joined college and till now .... there are many slangs ive learnt.... dont know how many more to go but whats itching me is that why not we make a few and try to propagate them maybe someday it hits the gen X.... the things which inspire -
lols... muaah....fyi...wtf....shoot....brb ....just while writing these i wonder what would princess mia's( fame princess diaries), grandma would feel about it... whoops sorry granny.....
and imagine jst like muaah, we make our written conversation with sound effects....
" Respected boss,
fyi achooooooooooo ...... sorry for that.... sniff snifff....... i m having a bad phrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr( this can b the sound of blowing your nose) cold..... sniiiiiieeef.... allow me leave till i get fine achoooooo.... uhu hu hu,brb
yours snifff sincerely,
thanks phrrrrrrrr"
that would make your boss understand the gravity of situation and if god forbids hes like mine and doesnt reacts to this kinda application... smear the application with your sputum that should do the trick........

BALANCE AMONGST UNEQUALS

I used to idolise my english teacher in school. Once we were reading some poem and she told us that day that jealousy and envyness are two opposite things but still theyre used as synonyms....If you are envious that means you would love to be in the persons shoes but you dont feel bad about it....jealousy she said was the copyright of the Satan inside us....Whenever you are jealous you are bad....

Given a chance,(well its my own blog, yippieeee!!!!!!!!), id like to classify humans into two catagories based on their instincts-

• the pushers or shovers
  

• the royal losts ( i admittedly belong to this catagory)

so i fail to understand about the shovers , actually there are many things like,
how do they seem to know everything?
why are they always in a hurry?
why do they like to complete their work before its taught?
why do i have to keep good relations with people only because they have power? etc etc......

so the pushers and shovers , what i believe is , have the genes of the era wherein the population was too high and there was survival of the fittest....remember Will Smith in The Persuit of Happiness?? a shover...
The shovers will never sit till they reach the top, they want to be the first ones, to be admired and if by chance heavens forbids there are two of them in one same project, god save the rest! They ,with my sincere apologies, are jealous of any other persons success... They are wild...

But the thing is the lazy bums never seem to work hard towards surviving, because the failure doesnt deter them as their too much doting parents have killed the survival instinct inside them... isnt it dangerous too??

Maybe the shovers succeed in life far more frequently.... but they seem to have lost to admire the moral grounds on which our constitution is laid....
imagine each of the hundreds of millions of pushers in our country....do we really need a mass stampede??
who will take care of all the dead bodies then?
perhaps it will make our community more on the wild animals side who dont even come to know that they should breed fast because they are endangered because all they want is to kill others..

The lazy royals who have a good heart will perhaps balance the rest and make our planet humane, and if they by chance develop the green face of jealousy, theyre even worse... in that case id like to sleep till i whither away.

Whenever we work, whenever you stay with people, dont even secretly be jealous of someone....instead compliment them and get up you lazy coutch potato,Stop dreaming forever and buckle up!!!!And for our lovely pushers... please push some lazies along with you too!!....
See you all at the top :)

ON THE CONTRARY.......

It struck my mind only when one friend( obviously a male , you will know why as you read).....texted me on eighth of a march..... " We celebrated Women's day here...I loved it but temme why only women get to have a full day to themselves whereas we dont?" Later in the same message he accepted that men are not nice enough for the previlege.....

Well recently when i heard about the 33% reservation for women in the House of Parliament, I felt overwhelmed at the thought of it and now .... i think id go for it now that my chances at this have increased to 33%!!!!!!!!!!

Being a commoner throughout my life, without any special skills except imitating pigs ;)....I HATE RESERVATIONS but this post isnt doing anything to make male chauvanists feel better.... Hereby I want to acknowledge that all the "breadwinners".....have some problems in their genetic makeup which naturally tries to make them " I am smarter, I know it all, specially what you dont".....
sorry to all the decent guys in my life , but this is what you should avoid, please :)

" oh girls cant drive"
or
" you dont know what life really is"
or
" i can repair our car, our geyser, the leaking taps of our home"
or
" you going alone? so late at night?"
or
"stay away from that person"

All i mean is we can really figure out the answer as equals if we dont think what gender we belong to whenever some kind of problem arises..... You shouldnt make things so apparant that we( i m the girls party) feel like vulnerable because we aint most of times and when we are, we would love to take your help and also because our society is already quite confused with girls who behave like boys, boys who behave like girls, homosexuals , boyish boys and girly girls.... wonder whos next, half and half???

However on the contrary we love it when guys open the car's door, or put up with our luggage while travelling, remember all those crazy roads most of the girls never seem to remember or simply telling us," we will be proud to be related to you when you become an MLA :)"

so basically the society needs people who have mutual respect for each other ............. and the resevation is a good step to help make us equal....I just wish there comes a stream where we have quotas for males, home science anyone??? :p

ALL OR NONE?

Now this is one question which can haunt anybody at anytime.... my first encounter with this rather annoying fact of being a homosapien was when i was probably two years old and one uncle asked, beta chocolate or ice cream???

In prompteiu the answer was, both... well i believe this is a trait which every person on earth has , how mean it is to make us feel deprived of what we cannot have, right??

i think some people improve themselves with time...or adjust( a word which i know, but never understood)...

so i applied all or none principle throughout my life,whenever i could, but it has given me more troubles than happiness....
for example:

• eating both chocolates and toffees and what else made me obese :(
• I faught with my sibling for a better part of my life ( when we could have been best friends) because i wanted all the attention in the world from my parents.
• then i wanted every one to like me and i ignored my parents .... duh
• Then i couldnt share my best friends with others so i sobbed instead of spending a healthy happy life for either of us.

so guys this is what i learnt from yet a small and insignificant life till date - Each twenty four hours, just take out some time to reflect on what you can do so that the people who matter most , ( and not every tom or harry) , they smile and enjoy living.... with you.... everyday make them realise that they matter , dont keep secrets, be truthful and work hard for present as its the only thing which is .... present...
amen

Randomness I

i love to travel alone by bus when i am going home.... It takes eight hours for me to reach my hometown from the place i work, considering ive visited my home twice this week!!!( good lord, we dont have delux buses till chandigarh!!!)... i was wondering off many things, are there more people like me??
god can answer this but one things for sure its all worth it when i get hugs and grins and treats and gifts , the food is stuffed inside you that you can survive a decade , perhaps more without it( no wonder people used to call me golu back in college)...
lets see what kind of thoughts are there when we are all by ourself... immobilised for hours:

1. Its been like five years i am travelling in buses, the railways are not well developed in the part of our country, countless times all ive concentrated is on how not to pee in my pants!!!!! " please drive fast you moron!!, distract distract, songs, podcasts... finally all i do is pray and promise god that ill be careful next time"... till date my record is phew almost clean :)

2. I think of the ways to irritate my brother( whos trying to get into a law college ) , with the gifts for the people of ages 0 to 5!!! till now i proudly declare ive given him a fake egg, a pink soft toy, a water tank, a horse which moves in circles, a pen which gives you a mild shock amongst others....

3. I think of all the worries and decide that i am indeed strong enough to handle them